I don’t particularly like picking on the Methodists any more than I do the Pentecostals or Episcopalians.
But this was too easy. A few years ago I bought tickets to the Carrollton First United Methodist annual missions BBQ fundraiser. When I showed up for Sunday lunch at FUMC, well, they were out of BBQ. The kind lady at the front desk offered me a cookie. I wrote about it and enjoyed some good-natured kidding with our friends down the street.
Well, lo and behold they gave out of BBQ again this year. Upon hearing this news, I headed straight to my computer to write the easiest article ever. This was like hitting a softball off a tee. There’s nothing like poking fun at the sprinkling Methodists.
We have a great relationship with them, by the way. We share. They send pigeons our way, then we baptize them and send them back. Baptist baptized pigeons aren’t really a problem because they only show up at Easter and Christmas.
We have shared buses with each other as the need arises. Their bus works great, once we get the snakes out of it. (I thought only Baptists were snake handlers.) And we have to remove the life size cut-out of John Wesley from the front passenger seat. Well, there is one problem: the driver says that every time it passes a Hooters restaurant, the bus veers in that direction. I’m just reporting what he says.
Seriously, we share lots of good stuff with our Methodist neighbors besides buses and pigeons. We share a common faith. Our beliefs are actually very similar. We share a common commitment to witness for Christ in this community and a common commitment to help the needy. We participate together in community services like Holy Week and Thanksgiving. We are friends who share a concern for one another and a sincere wish for the success of the other.
I think the words of Paul to the church at Philippi are good words to all Christians in this community: “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others” (2:3-4).
So, I wanted so much to tease again about running out of BBQ, that is, until I heard that they served 728 plates. Are you kidding me? Seven hundred and twenty eight? Congratulations to them on that; what a great cause too. I hope their youth have a great mission trip.
My only complaint this year is that it could have been 729 plates. No one, I mean no one from FUMC offered me one. As you can tell, I’m not bitter about it all, and I don’t hold grudges. You would think that one of my Methodist friends (I have two or three) would have offered. To make things right, if one of them will come to FBC, I will donate to the mission effort, minus the BBQ. It’s my way of showing what a good sport I am and that I don’t hold grudges. (Are you listening Scott Barrett, Larry Patton or Tim Criswell?).
And by the way, when the Methodists need our bus, they can have it. However, ours doesn’t veer towards Hooters; it veers towards liquor stores. We just hope nobody sees us in there. Of course, I’m kidding. Baptists don’t go to liquor stores, at least not in buses.
But we love our BBQ.